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Thursday, August 18th, 2005
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12:16 pm - Ah..well its been quite sometime.
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My summer end on September 6th. ::le sigh:: I think my summer was pretty good I guess. I did get to spend most of my time with the one I love. :D I can't believe Felipe and I are still together. It's great and swell. (haha I used the word "swell," I am quite silly.) We've lasted 9 months and 4 days. This might be my longest relationship, well I sure hope so.
One thing that has been making me feel so giddy is the when I see him, he has this cute happy smile. I think to myself, am I the one making him smile? It feels nice to see someone actually be happy to see me.
Kat is still in my life. I hate it. I want her out. I don't want to hear about anymore. I've been as nice as I can. I hate having to be mean, I really do. :\ I've told her to stop calling my cell but she won't. She's been sent to a group but I know I will hear from her soon. (Wow, after reading what I just wrote about Kat, I made it sound like I dated her haha)
Well, gotta go and finishing getting ready before the mother arrives. Good day to you. Adieu.
current mood:  hopeful
current music: The Used- Hard to Say
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| Saturday, April 2nd, 2005
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3:46 am - insomnia.
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I don't understand why I don't feel sleepy. Why can't it be so simple to just fall asleep. It's so frustrating. Maybe its the thinking. Argh, I hate it. I want to just clear my mind, delete every pessimistic thought in my head. I hate to feel like I'm alone. I don't know who to talk to anymore. I feel like my friendships are slowly fading away. Soon enough I'll barely see any of my friends because we'll all be going to different colleges. And my old friends. Oh, how I miss them. I wish I could hang out with some of them like old times. It would be nice. I hate losing friends, especially the ones I actually loved and still love.
narcOtic sKanK: our friendship isn't the same like the past right?
CerebrumShock65: yea
narcOtic sKanK: you don't consider me a close friend right?
CerebrumShock65: well would u consider us to be close?
narcOtic sKanK: well i'm asking you that
CerebrumShock65: well i wanna know wha u think
narcOtic sKanK: thats the thing, i really don;t know
CerebrumShock65: well i trusted u up until the point u mentioned something i told u not 2
narcOtic sKanK: ?
CerebrumShock65: notin, nvm
I'm so sorry, Morris. It hurts to know that you lost trust in me.
I've been listening to this song over and over and over. I love it.
Well, I'm off to stare at the lovely ceiling.
adieu.
current mood:  pensive
current music: Death Cab for a Cutie- Transatlanticism
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| Sunday, January 23rd, 2005
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5:27 am - sleepless nights.
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sleep·less
adj.
1. Marked by a lack of sleep: a sleepless night.
2. Unable to sleep.
O_O i wish i had a pill that could knock me out cold. but not only for one night. i want to dream. dreams have meaning and are unoridinary. sadness and fright may occur in dreams but to me it seems i have more happiness in my dreams.
it seems impossible but i want to dream forever.
current mood:  awake
current music: hometown hero- eighteen
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